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Whether you choose to have sex or not, it is important to be able to talk about sex. It can be uncomfortable to have conversations about sex, but it gets easier if you know the facts.
Bottom line: When it comes to sex, open and honest communication is essential with friends, health care providers, parents/family, and partner(s).
Talking With Your Partner
The best time to talk with a partner about HIV and other STDs is before you start having sex. If you are already in a sexual relationship, it is still better late than never. Tell your partner you want to talk about this topic so the two of you can be closer and worry less.
Get tested together. By knowing each other's status, you will eliminate any uncertainty. If either one of you does have an STD/HIV, you will want to discuss how to prevent the other person from getting it. Your health care provider can help you answer these questions.
If a couple is open about safer sex and each person's sexual history, they can create a stronger and safer relationship. If your partner is reluctant to talk about STDs and HIV/AIDS, you may want to start the discussion by saying that being open is a way for you each to express that you care about the other's safety and health.
Talking With Your Health Care Provider
Some health care providers may not discuss HIV or other STDs with their patients. If your provider does not bring up the topic, you should!
Be prepared to be open about your sexual history, including sexual experiences, number of partners, methods of protection or contraception used, and drug use history.
You should also mention any bodily changes, including menstrual cycle changes, vaginal or penile discharge, genital discomfort, or genital skin changes. If you're not open and honest with your provider, he/she will not be able to help you.
Questions for Your Health Care Provider
So, you've found a doctor, made an appointment and now, the big day is here. What should you do? Just follow the three Ts: Take control, trust and talk. Here are some topics to cover and tips for asking questions:
- Write down a list of questions before you get to the doctor's office. Be sure to note anything unusual such as painful areas and rashes, bumps or sores that won't go away
- Ask whether you should be tested for HIV and/or other STDs
- Be honest about your sexual experiences, your lifestyle, and if you use protection
- Ask about your provider's policy on confidentiality if you are concerned about privacy
- If something feels uncomfortable or confusing, you should always ask your health care provider: ‘Can you explain what is going on?’ or ‘Can you slow down, please?’
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